Silent Intramurals

Sadly the XU Intramural Days of SY 2005-2006 was not that thrilling at all, well at least in my point of view. Maybe it was because of my great expectation of this special event that may have led me to think that the intramurals of this school year was bland. Sure there were these occasional shouts and screams when someone scored a goal but I really did not feel the spirit of teamwork, competitiveness, and perseverance. I could only feel the aura of boredom looming around the campus. It even shocked me to have experienced serenity and peace in the once overpopulated and earsplitting hang-outs of the campus.

Maybe the intramurals wasn’t boring after all. Perhaps the students already had fun staying at their homes pleasuring themselves from the break from classes. And for the few students who cheered, maybe it was already enough for them to soak in the scorching rays of the sun, cheering for the mud-covered players giving their all to win. Another very good reason why the intramurals wouldn’t be boring may be because I only saw the boring part of the intramurals. I’m sure that the Cheer Dance Competition at the end of the Intramural Days would be more exciting. Over all, the intramurals was not bad at all, it just needed some zest and more participation on the students' part.

The Nerds as defined by Fr. Xrysz (I'm one of them!)

xrysz, sj: "Richie Fernando Class is "sui generis." One can understand them only from within. They will remain incomprehensible in the eyes of an outsider... They have their own place in history... they shall shape destiny... I am privileged to have some sporadic glimpses to the stirrings in their souls... the groaning of their desires... shedding of their tears... the whimpering of their fears... I am so blessed experiencing their unpretentious doubt, anger, cruelty... things that they show only to those whom they allow to be part of their "orbit existentialle." If "nerds" means "hopelessly studious, intellectual, speculative, page-eating individuals," these people do not deserve the title.... but if by "nerds" we refer to "people who experience life to the fullest, and learn to love their humanity with its pains and joys, failures and triumphs, folly and wisdom... and in the end choose that which is true, good and beautiful," then ~dara, rap, sweet, maxine, mikh, edgar, nerissa, bernie, kirbz, jo_blanc, mirandz, charm, cars, xtine, jboy, jowee, kc, dale, migz, nice, chikay, michael, edz, xta, deeka, neil, kaye, dj, eloise, mike, mark, karen, jiggy, demi, chee, popo, andre, sherrz, jux, blah, rosie, donnskie, 88, mampi, chloe, beaver, charles, richie~ad maiorem natus sum!"

ShIrox's very interesting profile an blog...

I saw a very interesting blog!

NEWSFLASH!!! Upon my very investigative investigation (wahahaha) I have found out who Shirox is. Here is his short profile...

shIr0x™
Age: 17
Gender: male
Astrological Sign: Scorpio
Zodiac Year:: Rabbit
Industry: Government
Occupation: IT Student / Drummer
Location: Singapore : East : Singapore
About Me: go to http://www.a-l-l-a-n.blogspot.com to find out.
Interests: Drumming reading blogging photography music computer games Vodka ...
Favorite Movies: Forrest Gump The Lion King The Bone Collector Back to the future Ray ...
Favorite Music: Dir En Grey X-japan Malice Mizer Taking back sunday Saosin Sum 41 Green Day Finch Transplants.

This short profile simply gives us a blurry picture of who this guy is. He's so cool! You should visit his blog and learn more. He's still a working student, he says that he's happy to recieve but his parents are not so happy about giving. He likes death as shown by this short but very disturbing and inspirational poem:

SET ME FREE
Love me, my razor blade. Peel my skin, make me scream. Sink so deep, make me weep. Cut my flesh, make me bleed. Take my life, set me free.

I for one am very moved by his words. He may use vulgarities in his blog but here is his reason: "It is part of life. why do your armpits stink? because it is part of life so learn to live with it. i have a fucking boring life. i have no life. i'm worse than a nerd who digs his books everyday. i don't even have anything to dig into. OMG."

A very intelligent mind indeed. Very hard working, a compoter addict (hehehe), an artist (music), and a true blood Asian.

An update of my life... from where I left of...

I don't really get to post these days. Nursing is so demanding. it takes your time, money, and strength! I'm already so stressed out that I don't think straight anymore. Well Nursing is ok at times, especially when I get high grades wahaha... I won't post my grades na... People might say I'm a bit showy but I love my midterm grades! I just don't know how my final grades would look like, I wish that somehow they would still look the same! I'm having a hard time consolidating my posts between my blog and the tataknerd.blogspot.com blog. I'll try to post on both every time i'm online. nothing really special is happening in my life... just study, sleep, eat, and test. With a dash of projects i haven't done yet! I feel that i'm only a step away from losing my self! I'm becoming crazier by the moment. I'll end my very late post here. I have to finish my IMP work that my group mates are not helping me in!

Here's the story... I still have my essays to knit together and proof read, damn groupmates! Grr! They always let me do all the work! I should resign as team leader and let them do the thinking and planning and I won't cooperate so that they could feel the difficulty I'm going through. As in if they really wanted to be journalists then they should have the passion for it. They should have the initiative to write articles about the output they got from their interviews and area works! And if I tell them to do something it turns out mediocre! Where is MAGIS!!! GRRRR! Imagine, they write an article or whatever and then they give it to me in a draft paper?! Hello! Do you expect me to encode your work for you! It would be Ok if I didn't have other articles to edit! I plan of telling them my problem but I don't think that they can handle my wrath!!!! (Horns growing out of head by now)... I could resign but I fear that our work will be shit. Sorry, I do hope my group mates don't get to read this... But not all my group mates are lazy and undependable. It so happens that we don't get to see each other during ordinary school days.

What is happening to the nerds?

It's really is so depressing... What is happening to the xu nerds? Is there really an issue here that the XU nerds are just simply slipping away? Please, huwag naman. I can't bear to see you guys like this. Take me instead... What can I do to change all of this from happening? Buhuhuh... really so depressing...

To all Nerdz, you've made me cry!

nerd no. 6

Today is a Friday night, well yesterday was. I’m alone in my room right now. I just want to thank you NerdZ for making me cry! Yes you did! But it’s not a bad thing too. Only the people I love and matters to me are the ones that can make me cry. They can either make me cry because they’ve hurt me or they made me extremely happy. Now, I thank all of you for making me cry because you all made me happy. Why do am I saying all this balderdash all of the sudden? Well, I just happened to read your palancas to me to our retreat at the Jesuit Retreat House in Malaybalay last February 18, 2005.
You know it doesn’t mean that I don’t love all of you just because I’m quite or just because I don’t talk to you often. Just because you people don’t hear me doesn’t mean I don’t think of you and long to see all of you. Believe it or not I do care for you all. You have become a part of me; you’re not just my past. Where ever I may go and whatever I do, the memories of you guys still haunt me. I don’t know if I’m obsessed with you people but I just simply miss you guys. I miss each and every one of the 48 NerdZ if I’m not mistaken. Well that’s 49 if you include Father Xrysz. How I ache to once again sit at my chair in the Fernando classroom and listen to Father Xrysz’s discussion on Morality once more.
I know that I’ve said this so many times that it already sounds so dull but I will never be tired to say it over and over again…. I just miss all of you and hope that you wouldn’t forget me. I know I won’t for each and every one of you has a special place in my heart. I will always be a Nerd in mind, heart, and action. To the people studying in far flung places I miss you and take care. To the NerdZ in XU hope we still greet each other, sorry if there are times I don’t see you in the hallway or something. We may have sad and even bad times together but there were also the good times.
Thank you for everything guys. Why am I feeling like this? I feel that I have a hang-over of my high school life. How ironic, I so wished to end my suffering in high school so much that I forgot that I also had extremely happy times.
To my lunch buddies how are you? I miss all of you… Especially Demi who I don’t hear from lately, hope you’re okay. Sorry if hotheaded ako sometimes but I really love your company. Michael, hi I’m so glad I still see you. Daryl sad and Miranda and Nerissa, you guys are so special to me.
Gosh I so want to make palancas again! Sige, I’ll e-mail nalang you guys. Or better yet Friendster. Basta I’ll spend my midterm break in getting in touch with you guys. Take care you all! This is Edgar na nagpaparamdam….

Internet Ecstacy drown the Drain!

Buhuhu! No more internet for me! I mean my dream of unlimited internet with a speed of 128 kb/s has gone down the drain! Why do I live so far away from civilization in the first place?! It's so ironic! I already have the right equipment for the Smart WiFi and I've already paid for the installation fee and for the one month subscription. The only thing is our damn location isn't reachable by the WiFi signal! Argg! Why! Why do I \have to stick with Sotelco's 28.8 kb/s at the most internet speed? Well, it is better than nothing but if you compared Sotelco's Php 100 for 10 hours of very slow internet speed to Smart WiFi's unlimited internet for Php 800/month of very fast internet speed it's so degrading!!! I mean depressing! Or both! We should really consider moving to the city! What is it here in bukidnon anyway? The nosy neighbors? The uncivilized, WiFi unreachable, hard to go to place? There must be a reason. Just don't know why... where is justice! Wahaha!

Boring

I’m depressed right now. I’ve always been depressed. I feel that my life is a constant rerun. I really am bored, sick, and tired of my routines that are so monotonous. Sometimes, I just want to sit at one corner and don’t care anymore. Who cares about school or friends and family? Is this really what lies ahead for me? I feel so empty and I know and I feel that there is something out there that I need to be truly happy. I don’t want to do anything right now. I don’t want to think and I don’t want to move. I want to be like a rock so that I could not feel anything anymore. They say that this feeling is normal for teens because of all the hormones and changes that are occurring within me. It is also true that I have to find who I am. Everything is so confusing. I don’t understand myself right now. Sometimes I feel that I am already complete and that I don’t need anyone. I feel that I have everything planned out and that everything will be alright. But everything is not that easy. I want to jump of a cliff right now. I want to hide my self somewhere because I am not in the mood to be with anyone right now. My head is starting to hurt. I feel that I’m crazy, a madman. I can really relate to the anime, “Vision of Escaflawne.” I’m just like Hitomi. I just want to sleep and never wake up. When I am asleep I forget everything. I forget all the problems and pains that I have to go through every single day. I seem to vanish when I’m asleep and no one ever notices. But the question is do they even notice me when I’m awake? I feel that I wander and that I have no where to go. This must be the reason why I love taking walks in the evening. I’m not depressed when I’m alone because when I’m alone I don’t feel left out when I’m in a group. In fact, I prefer being alone because I can think more and reflect on things like I’m doing right now. But what am I longing? What do I need to make me whole? What is it that I look for? I don’t really understand.

Loyola Group

I really did not want to go to Manresa today for the community building and planning of the Loyola Group (FFP representatives). It’s a Monday and it’s not just any ordinary Monday, it’s a day that I can have a break from school. I really have no plans to do anything related to school today but I had to because I was chosen by my class to represent them. I could have easily declined but I felt that it was my responsibility and duty as a class officer to represent them. The assembly place was at 7:30 am at XU in front of Goldcrest so I had to wake up early because I went home to Bukidnon last Sunday. I was almost late and I was lucky to have caught up with the group when they were about to take a jeep to Manresa. But I did not regret coming a single bit because I really had fun. I think I even had an overdose of laughter when we were discussing our plans and projects because my group mates were really funny and some of them were clowns. We had fits of laughter when a group mate played with her words adding –ing to her words like outreaching, SM-ing, immersioning, and the likes. I met new and old friends and I learned a lot of things. I was reminded that IQ is not all that matters because EQ also plays a vital part. They were just crazy and their proposed programs were absurd yet interesting like moving into the Loyola House because we were the Loyola Group or just build ourselves our own Loyola House. What’s more fun during the whole activity was the eating part. The food was really good and I wanted to have second servings. Before going home, we went to SM and sang songs at Quantum and ate again. I could say that the activity was a great success and I can look forward to a more fun, more energetic, and more tiring activities and programs.

Blogging

I am so happy because I can now update my blog, or online journal, regularly. Usually, I only blog when I have something that really bothers me or when I have a chance to write but now I have to write every day for my English journal which is a good thing. My address for my blog is http://vincentbautista.blogspot.com and it is powered by Blogger. Blogger was introduced to me during my third year in high school in my Christian Humanism class. My teacher created a blog for my class and we really enjoyed it. Now, some of my classmates and I, have our very own blogs. My high school classmates from third year to fourth year, the NerdZ, even have our very own blog, http://tataknerd.blogspot.com, aside from our Yahoo Group. Blogging has already been a very popular way of expressing ourselves. Friendster even has offered a blogging service signifying the growth of online journals or blogs. This is a very good news since it will help teens and people young at heart to develop their writing skills. Blogger even offers to store pictures in your blog so that you can share your special moments with people. There are a lot of things that you can add to your blog aside from your own posts. You can add a chat box, links to other blocks, and you can even customize your blog that is if you know how to encode an html document. I wanted to do all of these things just like what my friends did but I completely forgot my computer language and programming lessons and to think I only had them in fourth year, shame on me. If I have time I guess I can take a look at my computer book and encode my own blog. I have to be careful though because one wrong command or code could mean a ruined blog.